---
title: 'The Final Rest'
date: '12:00 02-05-2019'
taxonomy:
    category:
        - blog
    tag:
        - journal
description: 'Thoughts about my life'
author: 'Dan Percival'
image: home-pic.jpg
---

Buddhist texts. Useful readings if you’re struggling with depression and anxiety. Although I’m a Christian at heart, in some ways, I consider some of Jesus teachings to be very “Buddhist”. Like when he told the rich man to sell his possessions and follow him. A very unmaterialistic bit of advice. In Buddhism, it is implied that your possessions are the source of grief. I’m starting to feel the truism of that lately.

I own my own terrace house, nothing rich or fancy, just ordinary but it’s old. And leaking. Especially with the heavy torrential rains that are the norm these days. Normally because I know how much stress renovators cause me, I’d go up to the roof, apply a small fix to patch or reduce the leak and be done with it. But my mother recently moved in with me, and with my sister living next door, a chorus of nagging to fix the problem through a whole roof change grew and I had to give in.  So the contractor came along and gave me a quote and a time duration to do the work and soon, the chaos that I so dreaded started.

I knew that my mental state always take a downhill slide when anything disturbs my home environment. And, no surprise, that’s what’s now happening. The headache starts, my mood goes from very anxious to very numb. I keep wishing hard that the work will finish before my mind crumbles but the contractor says he can’t rush because he doesn’t want to do a shoddy job. Sigh. It amazing how my mind has so lost the ability to tolerate a bit of disturbance and stress. Depression and old age. Not a good combination. Maybe that’s to prepare one for the final journey, to a place of eternal rest. At least that what the pastor will say as he’s giving the eulogy.